Jokes

1. Why does a Jew pick his nose?
It's cheaper than using a tissue.

2. What is the title of the Jew favorite how-to-book?
"How to Make Money!"

3. When a Jew throws a party, what do his guests drive?
The goys crazy!

4. Why did the Jew rush to the discount store?
The ad said: "CHEAP!!!"

5. Why is the rhinoceros jealous of Jews?
Jews have bigger noses.

6. What time is bed time at the Jew's house?
When electricity is too expensive

7. What do Jews and niggers both like to ride?
Blondes


8. What is the worst stain on a Jew's underwear?
Lipstick from a Jewess

9. Why does the Jew do after one of his friends leaves?
He checks the sofa for loose change


10. What did the sunbather shout at the Jew?
No, I won't PAY you for sunshine!

11. What is a Jew's ideal of a perfect 10?
Any blonde he can get.

12. Why did the Jew want his own kid?
Cheap labor

13. What repulsive thing can be found in a Jew's clothes?
The occupant

14. What has a big nose, stinks, and acts like a repulsive jerk?
The typical Jew

15. Why did the gas company fire the Jew?
He was allergic to gas

16. Why are Jews' pants so big?
So they don't need to buy a wallet.

17. Why don't Jews eat pork?
The Torah prohibits cannibalism.

18. What did the Jew say to the bank teller?
I want MORE!

19. Where does the Jew look for dates?
Porn sites

20. Why does the Jew hate his own reputation?
The truth hurts!

21. What caused the Jew's biggest problem?
The greatest man who ever lived, ADOLF HITLER!

22. Why is it that Jews like to watch pornos in reverse?
They like the part when the hooker gives the money back.


23. Once a Prime Minister of a small African country came to Moscow with an official visit. During a reception, one high-ranked Soviet official asked the guest, "Tell me please, your Excellency, how have you solved the Jewish problem in your country?"
"We have no Jewish problem," the Prime Minister said. "We had once one Jew in our country, but we ate him...."

24. In a restaurant, a Frenchman, a Chinaman, a German, a Russian, and a Jew all were served tea, and in each glass there was a fly floating. The Frenchman looked at the fly, threw up, and ran out. The Russian drank tea and swallowed the fly. The German pulled the fly from the tea, sucked it thoroughly, threw the fly to a garbage can, and drank his tea. The Chinese ate the fly and left the tea intact. The Jew sold the tea to the German, the fly to the Chinese, and ordered another tea.

25. How many cost a dozen of your eggs?
15 rubles
Why so expensive? Close to you they sell for 10 rubles.
So, buy from them!
But they have no more.
Listen, when I have no more, I also sell for 10 rbls/ dozen!

26. Why do Jews have such big noses?
Because air is free

27. A Jew has been seized by KGB and all his property has been expropriated. He dials KGB and says:
Would you please tell me what time is it now?
Four ten.
Thank you.
In five minutes he calls over:
Would you please tell me what time is it now?
Four fifteen.
In another five minutes he calls over:
Would you please tell me what time is it now?
Four twenty. You are unbearable, Rabinovich, come down here and take back your fucking confiscated clock.